Hannah to Hannah #17, June 2001

You may read the email version of this issue in its entirety from our email group site. We hope to upload our website version to this page in the near future. Thank you for your patience.

The Following Remains UNDER CONSTRUCTION!

Providing "Christian Support for Fertility Challenges" including infertility or the loss of a child at any time from conception through early infancy.

A monthly publication of Hannah's Prayer Ministries.

PO Box 168, Hanford, CA 93232-0168 http://www.Hannah.org · Hannahs@Hannah.Org · voice mail / fax - (775)852-9202

~~In this Issue~~ *Surviving Father's Day *By My Side (poem) *Infertility as Seen Through the Eyes of a Husband *Ladies in Waiting E-Groups *New Hannah's Prayer E-mail Addresses *Upcoming Events *In the Next Issue *A Note from Stephanie *Hannah to Hannah subscription and reprint information --------------------------------------------------------------------- *Surviving Father's Day I fall into my soft chair and praise God for helping me through another Mother's Day. This year was different for me because I had church commitments that kept me from taking the day off. With the Lord on my side, I survived with little damage to my psyche. As I was just about to fall into a deep sleep, a wave of anxiety rushed through me – "Oh no! Fathers day is just five weeks away." This will be the 12th Father's day that I have been through since my ectopic pregnancy and the first since my own father went to Heaven. Father's day is just as hard for me as mother's day. My heart breaks when I watch my husband play with his nephews, knowing that this will be another year that he won't be acknowledged as a father. While He can accept God's plan in our inability to conceive, I seem to have a harder time. So as father's day approaches, I struggle to find the joy in this holiday too. All through the Bible we are instructed to "give thanks in all circumstances" (1 Thessalonians 5:18). I know how difficult this can be when you're living in a shadow of grief or the longing of a child. But we can always be grateful for who God is and how He wants to help us in times of suffering. The book of Psalms can be a great source of comfort and a wonderful reminder that God is always there for us. "The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble" (Psalm 9:9) He "…sees trouble and grief" (Psalm 10:14) He "…arms me with strength and make my way perfect." (Psalm 18:32) "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble" (Psalm 37:28) "With God we will gain the victory" (Psalm 60:12) Below are some brief suggestions to consider as you plan for this holiday and others that will follow: *Examine your attitudes and expectations. What are you worried about and what do you hope will happen? *Speak up –Acknowledge your feelings and let others know what your need. *Be realistic – don't overdo and take some control. *Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to grieve. *Do what is meaningful to your family. Don't let others pressure you into doing something that you're not ready for. *Most importantly – Turn to God for support and strength for He hears and answers our cries of distress. (Psalm 55:17) So as Father's Day approaches I plan to mourn a little for our still empty arms but also, Praise my Father in Heaven who has blessed me so much over the last year. I will sit in the nursery on Father's day and hold my "Sunday babies" and thank God for their fathers who bring them to church every week. As my husband plays catch with Seth, I'll thank God that Mike is a role model for his young nephew. And as the day comes to an end, I will thank God for the wonderful father that I was blessed with. I will take comfort in knowing God has heard my prayers and will find peace in His arms. ~Blessings to all fathers – past, present and future.~ --------------------------------------------------------------------- *By My Side -By Gail Fasalo Copyright April 1992 (Reprinted with permission of the author) Jesus is always by my side I know this to be true. He was there in my darkest hour And helped to pull me through. He gives me strength on the days It's hard to carry on. I pour my heart out to Him He's the one I lean upon. "I am with you always" said he I held His hand through my tragedy. When my work was dim and happiness nil He was there for me and loves me still. I trust in Him to guide me In good times and in bad. I ask for hope and comfort So I won't feel so sad. "I will never leave or forsake you" His words ring in my mind. He made sure His words would live And not get left behind. My faith has grown much stronger And I thank God each day. I have His greatest blessing His Love never goes away. --------------------------------------------------------------------- *Infertility as Seen Through the Eyes of a Husband -contribution from Richard Janis, a member of Hannah's Prayer There is a tendency for people to hold the mother more delicately that the father. Men in general have different ways of dealing with things. For me I felt horrible that we lost a child but also grateful my wife didn't hurt her reproductive organs or even die. We have experienced 1 ectopic pregnancy and 1 miscarriage with in the past 6 months. I feel for me, speaking from a mans prospective, I was always taught to deal with the hurt and move on, not to dwell in it. I believe that GOD has his way and somehow this was meant to happen for some reason. The thing that makes me upset the most is people telling me that at least my wife can get pregnant. We have been seeing a fertility doctor for a long time. To get pregnant finally was a lot of hard work. Then to lose the pregnancy it seemed we had to begin all over again. People that say these things mean well but don't really cater to the Problem or seem to brush over all the frustration and anger that goes along with it. Also for men I don't think people think it can be difficult for us and do lean towards how the women is feeling, after all there was a live embryo with in her starting to take shape and all of a sudden a life is lost inside her can be an emotional thing for her. But the man suffers to in the same way but just deals differently with it. My wife and I are still trying and hoping that someday will be soon. --------------------------------------------------------------------- *Ladies in Waiting E-Groups On May 19th Ladies in Waiting became an official ministry of Hannah's Prayer. Ladies in Waiting is a Christian e-mail support ministry with over thirty different support groups. Many of you are already familiar with Ladies in Waiting. For those who are not, over the next few months, I will spotlight the LIW groups with information on how to join. In the upcoming months, we will also be unveiling our new Ladies In Waiting site on www.hannah.org. Please watch for this exciting announcement. In the meantime, if you have any questions or comments about the Ladies in Waiting groups they can be sent to LIW@h... --------------------------------------------------------------------- *New Hannah's Prayer E-mail addresses With all the new changes going on within Hannah's Prayer, we found it necessary to add new e-mail addresses: General Director – Stephanie Bixler – StephBix@h... Assistant Director – Jenni Saake – JenniSaake@h... Assistant Director – Julie Donahue – JulieD@h... Hannah's Prayer questions/comments – Hannahs@h... LIW group questions/comments – LIW@h... H2H submissions/comments/questions – newsletter@h... Website questions/comments – webmaster@h... ---------------------------------------------------------------------- *Upcoming Events Book-signing – Empty Womb, Aching Heart with author Marlo Schalesky Saturday, June 23,2001 11am-noon Sharon's Books – in the Elm Shopping Center 366 Elm Avenue, Auburn California PCOSA International membership Conference – 3 days of information, support and socialization Friday through Sunday, June 8-10,2001 Valley Forge Hilton, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA For more information check out their website at www.pcosupport.org NACAC 27th Annual Conference – "Creating Ties that Bind" North American Council on Adoptable Children Thursday through Sunday, August 2-5,2001 Charlotte Convention Center, Charlotte, North Carolina www.nacac.org 2001 POF Conference Friday through Monday, September 28 through October 1,2001 Alexandria, Virginia, USA For more information check out their website at www.pofsupport.org 2001 Turner's Syndrome (TSSUS) National Conference Friday through Sunday, October 12-14,2001 Salt Lake City, Utah, USA www.turner-syndrome-us.org "Parenting from the Trenches" Conference with Denise Goodman of Ohio, the Saskatchewan Adoptive Parents Association and the Saskatchewan District Local Foster Families Association. Friday and Saturday, October 12-13,2001 Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada e-mail: adoptive.parents@s... Caleb Ministries 7th Annual Women's Discipleship Retreat Friday through Sunday, November 2-4,2001 Springmead Beach (South Myrtle Beach), SC www.calebministries.org *Is your organization sponsoring an infertility, adoption or infant loss seminar? If so, please let us know (e-mail Stephanie at newsletter@h...) and we will place an announcement in an upcoming issue of Hannah to Hannah. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- *A Note From Stephanie Last January Jenni Saake and Julie Donahue approached me about taking over the Director position of the Hannah's Prayer. I remember sitting at my desk, weak in the knees and wondering what these two were thinking. How can I take over such an amazing ministry and what do I have to offer? After a month of prayer and talking with my husband, I accepted this position. I am humbled by their faith in my abilities and I pray with God's help I can help in growing this ministry. After twelve years of infertility, I know how important it is to have a support system to around you. Without ministries such as Hannah's Prayer and Ladies In Waiting, I truly wonder where I would be today. Thank you Jenni and Julie for allowing God to use your infertility trials in ministering to others. I pray that I can carry on the ministry that you two have so faithfully begun. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- *In the Next Issue Growing Closer to God Through Your Infertility The July newsletter submission deadline is June 15,2001. Has God given you something to share that you think would minister to others? Hannah to Hannah is written by, for and about "modern day Hannah's" – couples facing fertility challenges. You are welcome to submit original thoughts, stories, poems, scripture passages, book reviews, pen-pals requests, baby memorials or celebration announcements, fertility –related humor or other articles to this newsletter. When sending a submission, please be sure to let us know that the information you are sending is intended for publication consideration. Due to space limitation, we are unable to include all submissions while some submissions may be edited or file for future use. Issue #19 / August 2001 – Infant Loss and Miscarriage – submissions by July 1,2001 Issue #20 / Sept 2001 – Handling diagnosis and treatment – submissions by August 1,2001 Issue #21 / October 2001 – National Infertility Awareness Month – submissions by Sept 1,2001 ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Hannah's Prayer is an international, interdenominational, Christian support network for couples who have experienced or are experiencing "fertility challenges", including, but not limited to, primary and secondary infertility and all stages of pregnancy/early infancy loss. Hannah's Prayer attempts the meet the mental, emotional and spiritual need of couples experiencing fertility related difficulties through prayer, understanding, love, friendship, shared information, biblical counsel and godly wisdom. We offer this monthly newsletter, Hannah to Hannah, along with our primary goal of establishing local care/support group chapters throughout the United States and around the world. Guidelines for reprinting from this newsletter For an individual organization to reprint an article first published in the Hannah-to-Hannah newsletter, permission must be received in writing from both the Hannah-to-Hannah editor and the specific article's author. The reprint on any article from this newsletter must include a printed mention of when and where the article first appeared and the mailing address of Hannah's Prayer. Example: "The Waterfall" by April Whiddon Matthews has been reprinted by permission and first appeared in the Spring 1997 issue of Hannah to Hannah, the newsletter of Hannah's Prayer, PO Box 5016 Auburn CA 95604-5016. A copy of the publication in which the Hannah to Hannah article is reprinted is to be sent to Hannah's Prayer within one month of publication.

We realize that infertility or the loss of your child can cause financial strain along with the emotional, physical and spiritual suffering. Because we do not want anyone to feel financially pressured by this ministry, we are committed to not charging membership or subscription fees for our services! While the desire to ease the financial burdens of our members is of high importance to Hannah's Prayer, we often find ourselves struggling to finance all the areas of ministry we would like to provide. Monthly bills include web site hosting, telephone charges, postage, library and study materials, business supplies and more. There are many special projects in our long-range ministry plans that simply are financially unattainable at this time. To meet the costs of continued ministry growth we are looking for creative ways to expand our financial options. Until now, our primary (and at most times, only) funding has been directly through voluntary, tax-deductible (for those paying United States taxes) contributions. All such gifts are greatly appreciated and used prayerfully to help ease the pain of those who turn to us for comfort. If you are able to help with the financial needs of this ministry you may make a donation through your PayPal (www.paypal.com) account to hannahs@hannah.org or you may mail a check (in US funds) to: Hannah's Prayer PO Box 168 Hanford, CA 93232-0168 USA We are pleased to announce some exciting new options. Help us to help others while you enjoy the benefits of these fund-raising programs! It is our pleasure to introduce you to our new Fund Raising Partnership Cards from Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. Here is how the program works: You purchase a $20 Partnership Card from Hannah's Prayer and Hannah's Prayer will get to keep $10, a 50% profit for each card we sell. Your twelve-punch Card will allow you up to 12 free dozen Original Glazed Doughnuts with the full price purchase of any 12 dozen of your choice. There is a limit of 3 free dozen per visit (with the purchase of 3 dozen). Your Card will bring you a saving of over $65 worth of free doughnuts! A great value for you and a helpful financial boost for Hannah's Prayer. Hannah's Prayer is offering a pre-order deadline of September 15, 2001 for our first shipment of Cards. If you wish to purchase one or more Cards, you may send a check to Hannah's Prayer in the amount of $20 (per card) or you may email your order through PayPal (www.paypal.com) to the address of hannahs@hannah.org. Hannah's Prayer, PO Box 168 Hanford, CA 93232-0168 If you miss the September 15 deadline, we plan to purchase a second set of Cards on October 1, 2001. Cards will be mailed from Hannah's Prayer to our fundraiser participants within two weeks (if not sooner) of these purchasing dates. Future participation in this program will be dependant on the response you make to these initial program trails. Hannah's Prayer Ministries is a California based nonprofit 501(c)(3) corporation. We will always strive to operate with the highest possible integrity in the area of finances as in all other areas of ministry. All staff members are unpaid volunteers who are proclaiming Christians and have personal experience with the heartache of fertility challenges. This ministry has a "debt-free" policy and is only able to provide services as funds permit.

Hannah's Prayer is an international, interdenominational, Christian support network for couples who have experienced or are experiencing "fertility challenges", including, but not limited to, primary and secondary infertility and all stages of pregnancy/early infancy loss. Hannah's Prayer attempts the meet the mental, emotional and spiritual need of couples experiencing fertility related difficulties through prayer, understanding, love, friendship, shared information, biblical counsel and godly wisdom. We offer this monthly newsletter, Hannah to Hannah, along with many other resources such as our web site, chat room, e-mail groups, pen pals and local contact people throughout the United States and around the world. Because we understand that fertility challenges may cause financial suffering in addition to spiritual, emotional and physical pain, we are committed to not charging membership or subscription fees for your services. The gifts of those who are able to contribute to the ongoing needs of this ministry are our only regular source of income. Their gifts are greatly appreciated and prayerfully used. This ministry has a "debt free" policy and is only able to provide services as funds permit. Hannah's Prayer Ministries, Inc. is a nonprofit 501 (c)(3) corporation. Guidelines for reprinting from this newsletter For an individual organization to reprint an article first published in the Hannah-to-Hannah newsletter, permission must be received in writing from the Hannah-to-Hannah editor or the specific article's author. The reprint on any article from this newsletter must include a printed mention of when and where the article first appeared and the mailing address of Hannah's Prayer. Example: "The Waterfall" by April Whiddon Matthews has been reprinted by permission and first appeared in the Spring 1997 issue of Hannah to Hannah, the newsletter of Hannah's Prayer, PO Box 168 Hanford CA 93232-0168. A copy of the publication in which the Hannah to Hannah article is reprinted is to be sent to Hannah's Prayer within one month of publication.

The Following Remains UNDER CONSTRUCTION!

June 2001 All rights reserved. Copyright © 2001. Issue #17

Providing "Christian Support for Fertility Challenges" including infertility or the loss of a child at any time from conception through early infancy.

A monthly publication of Hannah's Prayer Ministries.

PO Box 168, Hanford, CA 93232-0168 http://www.Hannah.org · Hannahs@Hannah.Org · voice mail / fax - (775)852-9202